14
Nov
2011
Himym: Season 7, Episode 9
Tick, Tick, Tick
Sam Lindauer
If I wasn't more grizzled and cynical about How I Met Your Mother, I may have enjoyed the closing moments to this week's installment of "The Barney and Robin Show". But any chance of happiness was confounded by the insistence on dragging this mess along.

This week we find out that Robin and Barney actually screwed each other after the kiss in the back of the cab. This has made them both cheaters. Robin and Barney are disturbed by this, but they both realize that they are actually in love with each other, making the decision to tell their respective significant others and live happily ever after a simple one. Of course they feel awful about it (especially Barney for some reason) even though it's obviously the right thing to do. Here are my major problems with this:

1.\tBarney can easily dispose of women. Now before you say that Barney has real, true feelings for Borah (see what I did there?) he has constantly gawked, leered and sexually harassed since being in a relationship with Norah. His dumping her should be easy. Unfortunately, the show set Norah up as such a bland character, we are supposed to feel sad that he's breaking up with her. This should be simple and Barney being Barney should not feel bad about slipping up in monogamy.

2.\tRobin loves Barney like nuts. This is the Robin that spent weeks of the show making sad faces and making asides over how much she totally is (but not really) over Barney. The minute she gets an out she would fucking take it. Kal Penn saying "I love you" should mean nothing. Robin is kind of cold so she could get by that crap.

As both characters are overcome with guilt they decide to tell their significant other about the infidelity after the party for Sandy Rivers (Mr. Alyson Hannigan). Barney does it as kindly as possible, considering the writers thought it would be fun to have Norah's parents show up early to be there for the break up. The show invested so much useless time in trying to get us to somehow understand why these two people would be together, you'd think the split would have a thimble's worth of pain for the viewer. You'd be wrong. Hopefully we'll never have to see Norah ever again. How anyone thought these two actors worked well together is beyond me.

I'd like to think that "Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle" was equally beneficial for both Neil Patrick Harris and Kal Penn. I think NPH made the movie better and without Kal Penn turning in a fun performance, NPH might not have made such a strong comeback. But for god's sake I'd like to think that NPH and the good people at HIMYM headquarters are finished repaying Kal Penn. Granted Kevin has been miles more interesting than Norah as a boyfriend/girlfriend of the week, but I'm still tired of this. The fact that Robin gets wobbly knees and sticks with Kevin made me angry. Not angry the way the show intended, but angry that the show will dilly-dally these two characters until later in the season. I'm just tired of this. The writers are wringing stories out of a sponge that ran dry years ago.

Also Ted, Marshall and Lily go to a concert, get stoned and kind of walk around a little bit and do their stoned acting.

I would forgive most of these problems if this episode made me laugh. Unfortunately it was an almost laugh-free experience this week. I laughed at Marshall imagining that Lily would jump ship with Todd from Community (#Savecommunity) because of his ability to grow an awesome goatee. This episode felt more like a slap than an episode where everyone stays with their stupid boyfriend/girlfriend because it gives the impression of movement while keeping the show in an awful stasis. Just because Barney and Robin slept together and Barney broke up with Norah changes NOTHING. Things better get a move on fast because Barney has to be getting married at the end of this season and I don't see a bride in the picture.

Grade: D

Tags: How I Met Your Mother
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